Wednesday, March 30, 2016

Monday, March 28, 2016

Miserable March Monday

Greetings. This is The Daily Bone and I'm your windblown doggie reporter Chester L. W. Spaniel. 

Our ghostwriter had to work evening shift for the last three days, so we totally missed any kind of Easter celebration. We did not color eggs. We did not put on funny bunny ears. We did not cook a fancy meal. We didn't even have any marshmallow peeps! But it was nice and sunny those days. Yesterday it was downright spring-like. But not today! It's rainy and very, very windy. It's so windy, people's garbage cans are blowing around the neighborhood! We went outside for not more than five minutes and took some quick photos of me and my not-so-enthusiastic colleague Joseph (Joey dog) Spaniel.

We didn't see any Easter bunnies in our yard. Not even the Evil Squirrel Cartel showed up. However, someone sent us this photo: 

You have GOT to be kidding me!

We have a few miniature daffodils blooming. They come up reliably every year no matter what. 

We noticed the pear tree is just starting to put out buds. 

But it's starting to rain again. Time to go back inside and take a nap! 

Oh, but being up so late at night waiting for ghostwriter to get home from work had it's advantages. We got to see the moon rise up through the trees and the clouds. Last night it was very still and somewhat warm. We opened the kitchen window and listened to all the little spring peepers singing. 

They sounded just like the ones in this song. Listen carefully.

Hi Princess …

Friday, March 25, 2016

Easter Bunny Time

Greetings. This is The Daily Bone and I'm your doggie reporter Chester  L. W. Spaniel. 

It's that time of year again. By this I mean the annual arrival of the Easter Bunny. I get more confused about this every year. I know Easter has something to do with religion. As I've said before, human religions are something our doggie minds cannot fully comprehend. But I know enough to say that usually religions are based on the belief that there is a greater power in charge of things who wants all the humans to be kind to each other and have a happy and peaceful life. How blowing other random humans up with bombs fits into this deal I'll never understand. I'll just stop here on that subject before I get into trouble. 

I did a bit of research and found out that the Easter bunny concept began a long time ago. It just happens that Easter coincides with spring, which is the time birdies make their nests and lay eggs. Humans would go out into the woods and notice that bunnies often hid in the same bushes that the birdies nested in; and so someone had the bright idea to tell their children the bunny hid the eggs in there for them to find and eat. This somehow evolved into a holiday that includes bunnies, boiled eggs, chocolate, baskets, artificial plastic grass in various colors, squeaky toys, jelly beans, marshmallow peeps, TV commercials and cartoons, leg of lamb with mint jelly or ham with scalloped potatoes for supper, Charlton Heston movies, bright colored clothing, spring flowers, baby chicks and ducklings, with religion tucked in there somewhere. Again, my doggie mind is boggled when it comes to human symbolism. 

I see bunnies every so often in and around my yard. I've caught a few of them. They're always small, with light brown fur, and they can run very fast. Unlike squirrels, they cannot scamper up the nearest tree, and end up running around and around our yard several times and are great fun to chase! Our Miss Ginger was a superb bunny chaser! They can also scream really loudly, which surprised the heck out of my esteemed colleague Joseph (Joey dog) Spaniel one night when I caught one. I could never figure out why they come into our yard in the first place. It's surrounded by a fence, and what small gaps exist ghostwriter and Dad have blocked with big rocks or more fences. The whole yard is plainly marked with twenty years of doggie pee too! But I digress. 

Here's an ad in which the bunny somehow makes chicken noises. It leaves me totally confused!

These days the humans have decided that their little children should be able to visit the Easter bunny at the local mall just like that fat guy at Christmas. This bunny also often presides over parties and egg rolling contests. They are often surprised when their children are terrified of this gigantic thing with huge stand-up ears, enormous eyes, and weirdo smile. That would scare the crap out of me, that's for sure! 


To combat this fear, the humans thought up an ingenious plan: make bunnies out of chocolate. The children can then eat the Easter bunny and vanquish their fear. At least that's what I think. Ghostwriter found a video of her favorite candy store, Stevers,  located in Rochester NY. Watch carefully and you'll see some chocolate bunnies. 

We'll take a quick break here for Joey dog's annual warning about doggies and chocolate. 

Hello ladies and gentlemen. I'd like to take this time to remind you that chocolate, while delicious and safe for humans to eat, is a DEADLY POISON to doggies because it contains a chemical called theobromine. Please make sure to keep all chocolate Easter candy away from your doggie. Instruct your children at a young age to never give chocolate to a doggie. If your doggie accidentally ingests some chocolate, pour one ounce of hydrogen peroxide down the doggie's throat. This will make him or her throw up. Then proceed to your nearest veterinary hospital as quickly as possible. 

Well, I hope I have not left you as confused as I am about this human holiday. However you celebrate  Easter, we at The Daily Bone hope you have a wonderful time filled with peace and joy with your friends and family. And don't forget: keep that chocolate away from your doggies! You can give him or her a marshmallow peep, or some jelly beans though. Oh and we'd be glad to eat up all of those hard boiled eggs. Just saying.

Wednesday, March 23, 2016

Wednesday Evening News

Hello doggies and kitties and hermit crabbies and all your humans too! This is The Daily Bone and I'm your stalwart doggie commentator Chester L. W. Spaniel. We have a lot to cover, so we'll begin right away!

You can't tell from this picture, but I'm standing in the freezing rain. So is my doughty coadjutor Joseph (Joey dog) Spaniel, and our silly, yet determined ghostwriter, who just happens to have several yum yum delicious doggie treats in her pocket as well as a squeaker to keep our attention in this horrid weather. 

Hurry up and take the picture already!

Speaking of weather, our Joanna  human posted this weather warning this morning:

I think we can handle it. But seriously, we hope all of our friends in the region stay safe. It's the season for ice storms, you know.

In world news now, we were so sad and horrified to hear about yet another bombing by those violent terrorists! It was in Brussels Belgium this time. What is wrong with this world? Why can't everyone get along? Our doggie minds can hardly comprehend the evil.  

We will now have a moment of silence for all the people who were killed or injured and for their families.

We were very glad to see that the news coverage included those brave bomb sniffing doggies who were working hard to prevent another attack like that in airports around the world. 

Let's hear it for those smart, fearless, and loyal doggies! Hooray! 

We haven't said much about our network of news associates in other locations lately. So here are some pictures to bring you up to date. The most junior member of our news team, Pixie in Chicago, is getting bigger and loves to romp and play with her humans. Here she is taking a nap: 

Tibi and Maddie, in a rare moment of cooperation, are plotting to finally catch the annoying red dot. Tibi's almost got it in his front paws!

While Miss Charlee in Boca Raton Florida is catching up on her sleep. 

And Angus B. Terrier in North Carolina has been sulking about the rain! 

We have a couple funnies for you now.

Take a good look at Tibi's gray markings: 

Now look at the kitty cat in this cartoon: 

Looks just like him! 




We just found out that today is National Puppy Day! Hooray! 

And that's our report for Wednesday March 23.

Can we go inside now? 

Sunday, March 20, 2016

Happy Vernal Equinox!

Greetings everybody. This is The Daily Bone and I'm your fluffy doggie reporter Chester L. W. Spaniel. It was a very busy day! 

Today was the Vernal Equinox. That means the day and the night are of equal length. This has to do with the Earth being tilted. Ghostwriter tried to explain it to me using a tennis ball. That didn't work very well because, as loyal readers may remember, the tennis ball is ALWAYS mine!

Despite the bright sun shine today, it was quite cold out. Ghostwriter keeps threatening to bring us to Miss Jacquie the groomer for our spring buzz cuts, but not until it warms up outside. You see my erudite associate Joseph (Joey dog) Spaniel gets chilled easily now that he's getting elderly.

I am NOT elderly!

The grackles are starting to get serious about claiming their territory in the bushes around our yard. In fact, they left a calling card on Dad's car! Dirty birdies!

However, the Stodgy Robin Society also has claims to the area. They're going to give the Great Grackle Flying PTA (poop tosser's association) a run for their money. In the photo below, Seymour Pinfeathers III keeps grackle Greasy Dungflinger under close observation.

I haven't seen Mr. Seedcruncher, CEO of Sparrows Incorporated yet today. I'm sure he's in conference with his colleagues planning to defend their Arbor Vitae Deluxe Apartments and Convention Center by our back fence from those bigger birdie squatters.

It's a good thing Joey dog decided to intervene and patrol the perimeter for a while. I'm sure it would have been all out birdie war out there!

Meanwhile, on the other side of the house, I saw that pesky squirrel traipsing around in the birch tree outside ghostwriter's office window. He paused to make some kind of snarky comment, probably about that peanut butter sandwich—which I ATE!—but then he thought better of it.  

That's right. Keep moving, bub! 

We doggies thought we'd call it a day and take a nap when we got visitors!

Wow! Look at all the shoes! 

Our dear Oma was here!

So was our Jason and our Joanna human and our Auntie Linda and our favorite miniature human, Ryan with his  Mom and Dad!

There was a huge feast and everybody sat around the table to eat. Joey dog and I got lots of hand-out yum yum treats! This video was pretty much us doggies under the table:

A wonderful time was had by all! 

Then they all left. And the moon came out.