The Plot Thickens

Hello again. This is a TDB Special Report. I'm your diligent doggie commentator Chester L. W. Spaniel with an update on the missing squirrel saga. 

I saw a squirrel today! It was alias Twinkletoes (or as I call him: Ratface.) He was looking pretty humble after narrowly escaping that big hawk the other day. He made no demands for those peanut butter sandwiches he thinks I owe him. 

Grrrrowrrff! 

So he wandered over to the hanging birdie feeder to pick up the seeds the little birdies dropped on the ground. Loyal readers will remember that the grackles think those fallen seeds are for them exclusively. Soon the big grackle boss birdie, the honorable Effluvium Scatterstool, President of the Great Grackle Flying PTA (Poop Tossers Association) arrived. At first Twinkletoes ignored him.

Then, Twinkletoes turned and started trash talking Scatterstool. The President of the Great Grackle Flying PTA was in no mood for this and lunged at him! 

Twinkletoes thought he could just scurry and hide behind the pear tree.

Look carefully at this picture below. That black blur is Scatterstool dive bombing Twinkletoes, who's now running as fast as he can toward the silver maple tree trunk! Bwahahahaha!

So that's why the squirrels are missing from my yard! Well, don't think that's the end of the story. Because check out this scenario:

It's an operative from the Conniving Chipmunk Consortium! Yes, now a chipmunk has arrived to snarf the seeds that the grackles usually eat. Scatterstool got ready for another attack. He marched right up to him, but the chipmunk didn't move.

Those chipmunks must think they're pretty tough! He went on stuffing his face with seeds even when Scatterstool gave him his best stink eye! 

Scatterstool had to call for back-up. His wife, Squatty, arrived to help.

The chipmunk jumped up and the birds flew away! 

Nyah! Get lost birdies! 

Hahaha! The big bad grackles, who chased the squirrels away, were scared of a scrappy little chipmunk! But, a chipmunk is technically a squirrel. And a squirrel's a squirrel! 

Time for a doggie intervention!

Zoom!

And stay out! Harumph!

Stinky little chipmunk! I know your scent now! 

I think I scared the crap out of him, because he didn't just run away; he squeaked while he ran! Squeaky squeaky squeaky squeaky squeaky squeaky squeaky!

I love being a doggie! 

No Squirrels!

We interrupt this program for a fast breaking TDB Special Report. I'm your roving doggie reporter Chester L. W. Spaniel. 

We have not seen the squirrels, Fatty White-Ears or alias Twinkletoes, since last week! 

Fatty White-Ears

alias Twinkletoes (alias Ratface, I say!)

While this is a good thing—they're not raiding the birdie feeders—it kind of makes us wonder. But yesterday ghostwriter saw an interesting sight. There was a big disturbance in the top of the silver maple tree. Out of the corner of her eye for a split second, she saw a squirrel leaping down the branches with a big hawk after it! The hawk looked like the Cooper's hawk that we've spotted occasionally in our neighborhood. Ghostwriter said she thinks the squirrel got away into the Arbor Vitae Luxury Sparrow Apartment Complex bushes, but she couldn't be sure.

On the 20th we found a clump of robin feathers on the grass in our yard, which confirms that a hawk has been hunting in our area. The Stodgy Robin Society could not be reached for comment on the identity of the unfortunate robin. 

Please stay tuned for further reports. 

We now return you to your regularly scheduled program now in progress. 

(Oh, it's one of my favorite videos! Go Diesel!) 

No Sleep On Sunday

Hello friends and fans. This is The Daily Bone and I'm your tired doggie reporter 

Chester L. W. Spaniel. 

Our crazy ghostwriter worked a double shift last night. She was lucky one of the day shift nurses came in early so she could go home at 5AM. When she limped out the back door of the nursing home, she was surprised to hear the robins were all singing even though it was still dark out. When she got home, the Stodgy Robin Society of Eagle Ridge South members were singing loudly in practically every tree! The moon was still out too. By 5:45AM, the cardinals started singing too, followed by the chickadees, some screeching grackles, a crow, and then the house finches and sparrows. She should have just gone straight to bed as soon as she got home. But instead she stood outside and listened to the birdie concert!

Just when she finally got to sleep around 8AM, a neighbor started mowing the lawn! Who mows their lawn on Sunday morning?

But what's this?

Not to be outdone, Dad got out his own roaring dragon noisy machine scary monster grass slice and dice thing! We doggies went in when Dad fired that up! And still no sleep for ghostwriter!

She tried to take a nap later, but she said I was barking too much. Well, it's my job to scare the Evil Squirrel Cartel away! As the primary member of the Double Doggie Homeland Security System, since my aged associate Joseph (Joey dog) Spaniel is semi-retired, I have to work extra hard to protect and warn the humans every time the neighbor kids go by on their big wheelie bikes, or a car door slams somewhere, or people go walking by with their doggies, etc.

I am NOT aged!

It's now after 9:30PM. The neighbors are all inside their houses. The birdies are all quiet. We doggies are sleeping too. Ghostwriter is drinking a glass of wine.

Go to bed already! 

Saturday With Joey Dog

Hello everyone. This is The Daily Bone and I'm your trustworthy doggie commentator 

Joseph (Joey dog) Spaniel.

I've been watching my pear tree carefully as the buds get ready to bloom. 

There are plenty of bees around to help with pollination too. I hope we don't get a heavy frost!

This morning was kind of slow, so we spent some time watching one of my favorite shows:
Bizarre Foods! Today he was eating iguanas and alligators! 

It might be nice to go to all kinds of far-away places and sample every kind of food imaginable. But Dad and ghostwriter are the home-body type. Plus they tend to cook the same things all the time. But you won't see me complaining!

Teriyaki Salmon, Nishiki rice, and steamed vegetables.

Chips and salsa.

Grilled steak with mushrooms, wild rice, and mixed vegetables.

Spaghetti with grilled sausage, and salad. 

This morning was a good time to catch pictures of the birdies who visit our window feeder. Those rude squirrels haven't shown up. Yet.

My ferocious colleague Chester L. W. Spaniel has been watching for them, and jumps up and barks as soon as he sees one. But so far the visitors have been doves and finches.

Lots of birds have been visiting the hanging feeder too. The grackles have to eat on the ground underneath it because the ports close when heavy birds sit on it. As pompous as those grackles are, they have to wait for what the little birdies drop for them! Haha!

Then, when Chester looks out the window, the grackles take off. 

Bye bye grackles! 

Chester knows not to bark at the little birdies; and they're pretty brave now. Here's a picture of a sparrow, probably Mr. Seedcruncher, CEO of Sparrows Incorporated, eating seeds while Chester wanders right behind him! 

That's all for today. Ghostwriter has to go to work soon and won't be back home until tomorrow morning! (She's crazy!) But wait a minute!

Is that a pizza I see?

Yum!