Greetings friends and fans. This is The Daily Bone and I'm your doggie reporter
Chester L. W. Spaniel. I have a gold-plated story for you today!
I reported a couple weeks ago about a little gold finch who has been coming to the dining room window and pecking at his reflection. We didn't see him for a while. But now he's back! I tried to start a conversation with him.
Hey little birdie! What's your name? Why are you attacking your reflection?
Who's that talking to me? (peck peck peck) Whoever you are, I'll have you know, this is my territory! I claim it in the name of myself, Goldson Fort-Knox! (peck peck peck peck)
Hmmmm. I wonder if he can't see me, and thinks his reflection is talking to him? So I answered him. This is not your window! This is my window! I already claimed it in the name of Finchley Goldman-Sachs Esquire!
Oh yeah? Well I'll show you whose boss! (peck peck peck peck peck) Take that! (peck peck peck peck peck peck peck peck)
Nobody challenges ME! (peck peck peck) Bwahahahaha!
What a cheeky little fellow! Then, suddenly, he took off. Ghostwriter thinks he's probably attacking the rear view mirrors on the cars now. Must be related to Woodstock.