Take One, Take Two

Take One:

Greetings fellow food watchers. This is The Daily Bone and I'm your culinary expert doggie reporter Joseph (Joey dog) Spaniel, Doggie Chief Inspector, comestibles division, founder of the Yum Yum Coalition, and author of "The Yum Yum Coalition Safe Foods Directory" and "Rules For Doggie Employment."

As you know, the Yum Yum Coalition states that doggies posing for the purpose of photography are to be paid no less that two yum yums per session.

Our ghostwriter is aware of this rule, and therefore always carries four doggie yum yums in her pocket when she photographs me and my distracted associate Chester L. W. Spaniel. Two yum yums each. The treat we usually have are these Milkbone Marro Snacks.

Four treats: two for me, and two for Chester.

Why thank you. Don't mind if I do. 

Crunch crunch crunch …

Meanwhile, Chester is digging around in the wood pile at the other side of the yard.

I might as well take Chester's yum yum. 

Take Two: 

Crunch, crunch, crunch,

Crunch, crunch, crunch,

Oh, are we back on camera ? 

So where's Chester now? 

It doesn't look like he'll be doing any photo ops today! 

I'll take that last yum yum. No problem! 

Crunch, crunch, crunch.

The Yum Yum Coalition Rules For Doggie Employment clearly states: two treats per photo session. It then goes on to say, if you don't show up, your stand-in can have your treat. 

Pffffft.

(NO, I don't just make up the rules as I go along!)