Tuesday, August 11, 2015

Evil Squirrel Cartel Strikes Again!

We interrupt your regularly scheduled program for this fast breaking TDB news flash. I'm your serious doggie reporter Special Agent Chester L. W. Spaniel along with my resolute associate Special Agent Joseph (Joey dog) Spaniel. We are live, and on location in our back yard. 

The Evil Squirrel Cartel has been snarfing pears again! We picked up over a dozen pears from the ground under the pear tree! All of them were only partially eaten. What a waste! 

Chomp chomp chomp. 

Special Agent Joey tried to eat up as many as he could before they started to spoil and turn brown. I pitched in and ate a couple too. They were quite delicious, I must say. 

But that was not all! 

We also found evidence that the Squirrel Cartel has resumed building their winter headquarters in our silver maple tree. See that clump of leaves and sticks up there? A month ago, ghostwriter blasted it with the hose, forcing those twitchy tree rats to reconsider their real estate endeavor. But apparently, they must have laundered their nuts and refinanced or something.

We doggies have been postulating that perhaps the Evil Squirrel Cartel could be holding an operative from the Conniving Chipmunk Consortium for ransom. As you can see in this video, below, there is no honor among thieves! 


The Double Doggie Homeland Security System will have to redouble their efforts to protect our wonderful tasty pears from those voracious and wasteful miscreants. 

It's going to be a long haul to get our scrumptious pears to perfection without those noisome, nut-brained, fur-bearing varmints stealing them. In the meantime, please enjoy this video of a very dizzy squirrel. (hint hint : ghostwriter's birthday is coming up and we doggies think we should get her a spinning-around birdie feeder thing like that. Imagine how we doggies could clean up if the squirrels got really dizzy before we go out and chase them!) 



Oh, there will be a major, world class, wet and wild squirrel nest blasting session as soon as it gets dark out. We can't wait! We now return you to your regularly scheduled program already in progress.


  1. Glad dem pears didn't go to waste at least, BOL!

  2. OH NO!! time to call out the Squirrel Guard!!
    Dory, Jakey, Arty & Bilbo

  3. Hmmm, its dark now, did the pesky varmints find themselves evicted??
    And while your ghostwriter was out there did she look at the sky?? The Perseid Meteors were busy...growlmy saw some, Shooting stars! OMD!

  4. Its a good job you two are there to sort those evil squirrels....and clean up after them!
    That sky looks amazing, I'm waiting to see the perseid meteor shower tonight, weather permitting, its supposed to be good viewing tonight
    Loves and licky kisses
    Princess Leah xxx

  5. don't you hate it when they nibble just bits out of lots of fruit. We hope you get to have some that aren't chomped

  6. The squirrel nest got blasted with the hose last night around 9:30pm. No squirrels came out. So far today no squirrels have been sighted either. Maybe they got the message. Forgot about the meteors. Ghostwriter has been working an awful lot this week and went to bed. It's cloudy right now, but maybe it'll clear up and we'll see some tonight.

  7. WE tried blasting the birds that have taken over our tree but they come right back as soon as the water stops. Hope it works better with your evil squirrels!
    Mr Bailey, Hazel & Mabel

  8. Oh boy if you need any of them pears eaten up just call me cos I loves fruits!!!!!! Not squirrels.
    stella rose

  9. You can't turn your back for a MINUTE on the squirrel cartel. Here's to extra patrols!

    Abby Lab