Christmas is Coming

FLORIDA EDITION NEWS 

Hello. This is The Daily Bone Florida Edition and I’m your curious doggie reporter Miss Charlee Puppy. Be very, very quiet. I’m spying out the window. My humans tell me Christmas is coming, and I want to make sure that I see it coming.

I mean, there are Christmas songs I’ve been hearing occasionally; and I’ve been trying to glean information from them. I think Christmas is supposed to be snowy and white and jingly. I don’t see anything like that outside right now. And there’s supposed to be this guy dressed in red who is wondering if I’ve been naughty or nice. I’m thinking it’s that creepy little elf thing who keeps hanging around pretending not to be looking at me. 

My humans brought a tree into the house. A real tree! It’s not the kind we’d see growing around here, like banyans and palms. Then they put lights all over it, and warned me not to pee on it. They took a picture of me next to some chocolates that I can’t have. Whoa! That’s too confusing!

I’m only one year old and have never seen this Christmas thing before. If anybody has any ideas or clues about this Christmas stuff, please let me know!

FUNNY BONE

TDB FOOD ALERT

We interrupt your regularly scheduled program for an important TDB yum yum food alert flash. I’m your culinary doggie reporter Joseph (Joey dog) Spaniel coming to you live on location. 

Burritos from Chipotle’s have been spotted on our dinner table this afternoon. This one is filled with chicken, rice, black beans, and mild salsa, with guacamole on the side and a few tortilla chips. Yum! Rumor has it that Mom can never eat an entire one of these gigantic, overstuffed babies, so left-overs are sure to be imminent … 

My associate Chester L. W. Spaniel is analyzing these left-overs right now. Yes, it’s exactly half a burrito. We did get some choice morsels plus some chips, and have promises that more will be given out tomorrow. We will be sure to update you on the situation as it happens. 

We now return you to your regularly scheduled program already in progress. 

SNOW BUNNY

Hello. This is Chester L. W. Spaniel, your humble doggie correspondent and this is The Daily Bone, your best choice for up-to-the-minute reporting. 

There was a big snow storm the night before last. My ghostwriter was working the evening shift at the nursing home. She looked out the window to the garden and this is what she saw:

As a proper cocker spaniel and a hunting doggie, I would have invited the bunny in for supper. But alas I was at home at the time. The bunny enjoyed a silent night.

And now back to Miss Charlee Puppy:

He sees you when you're sleeping. He  knows when you're awake … Creepy.