Football

Hello. This is The Daily Bone and I’m your sporty doggie commentator Chester L. W. Spaniel along with my agile associate Joseph (Joey dog) Spaniel. 

Today Dad was watching football, (instead of the news.) I’ve tried my best to figure out this sport, but it continues to elude me, and boggle my doggie brain. Joey dog has lived a lot longer than I, and still can’t explain it either. But apparently Dad likes this game a lot, and gets quite emotional about it.

Mom, why is Dad yelling at the TV? 

From what I can tell, the game involves a kind of oddly shaped squeaky ball. (That’s OK so far. I like squeaky balls.) A whole bunch of big muscle men try to catch the squeaky ball and keep it away from the other men. (Still OK: I play keep-away sometimes.) But then I get confused. In the picture below, for example, they got all lined up nice and straight. But then they all started running in different directions. They all bumped into each other and lots of them fell down. It’s really hard to keep track of the squeaky ball in all that commotion!

The teams have funny names, like buffalos, and birdies, and other animals, and they wear different colors and numbers so they can tell who is who. Here are the blue buffalo guys (below.) This was the part when they all fell down; and then they did it again; and then again, except real slow; and then they all fell down again. Then some analyzer guys started talking about the falling down guys. I think the falling down guys fell down about ten times before a stripy shirt guy made some arm signals, that everyone was either really mad about, or else really happy about.  

Here is a team called the browns, but they’re wearing shiny orange hats. They had a big group hug, and then got in line again for some more falling down. Dad did a lot of yelling. (I think he wanted the buffalo blue shirt guys to win.) 

Just when I though the game was over, they all changed their shirts and kept on playing! You see? Now they have on purple shirts! Dad said these are the ravens. Where did the blue buffalo guys go? I was hoping to see a real buffalo! 

Dad tried to explain it to me, but I forgot what he said. 

But then Joey said I should come to the kitchen because Mom is cooking dinner. 

At last! Something I can understand! 

BBQ ribs, collard greens, mashed sweet potatoes, and green beans. Yum! 

And then the football was all done. Oh well, I guess I'll try to figure football out again next Sunday. 

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.