Dastardly Perpetrators

Hello. This is The Daily Bone and we're your watchful doggie reporters Special Agent Chester L. W. Spaniel and Special Agent Joseph (Joey dog) Spaniel. 

As you know, we are The Double Doggie Homeland Security System. We are on the job 24/7 and protect our home and yard from all kinds of evil miscreants. However, we have now found a foe against which we are helpless. (Personally we don't really care, but ghostwriter does.) Take a look at this:

This is all that remains of a bud from ghostwriter's favorite iris, code-named Hello Darkness. Inside the ruined bud is a fat, slimy iris grub. Ghostwriter despises these particular grubs! However, they usually don't strike until later in the season when the flowers are done blooming when they destroy the root instead. Ghostwriter digs up the roots, takes out the grubs, and replants the roots. We used to feed those grubs to our gecko Elvis, who would snap them up quick. But Elvis, as you know, after quite a long and productive life, left the building last Fall, and crossed the Rainbow Bridge. 

Iris: Hello Darkness from June 2014.

Iris:  Hello Darkness right now. 

This wanton destruction of the flowers themselves has put ghostwriter in quite a rage. We doggies have no idea how to locate these pests and destroy them. I have personally offered to trample the plants, but ghostwriter always yells at me when I do this. (Is it just me, or do humans seem weird about stuff like flowers?) 

Chester-zilla in the iris patch.

To add insult to injury, she also found another horrifying criminal against which we doggies are clueless. Today there were red lily beetle grubs on her last remaining Asian lilies. 

These disgusting creatures spend their time chewing up the leaves whilst hiding in piles of their own poop. Yuck! She picked them off their gooey piles and sacrificed them to the ant gods in their mound outside the front door. 

We doggies are sorry we are of no assistance against these garden pests. Ghostwriter does not like to use pesticides, but if anyone knows how to get rid of them, please let us know. 

This TDB was brought to you by:

THE DOUBLE DOGGIE HOMELAND SECURITY SYSTEM

24/7 PROTECTION AGAINST ALMOST ALL OF YOUR EVIL INVADERS.

WE TACKLE GRACKLES, SQUIRRELS, MOUSIES, RABBITS, AND SHREWS

BUT NOT GRUBS. 

AND BARKING IS ALWAYS FREE.