Critter Patrol

Good evening everyone. This is The Daily Bone and I'm your tireless doggie reporter
Chester L. W. Spaniel. 

I hope everybody had a great 4th of July! I'm kind of glad it's over. All the noise was getting to me.

You can tell summer's in full swing around here. There are critters everywhere! Check out this big fat bunny! This is not the first time I've seen this particular bunny. He seems to frequent the next door neighbor's yard in the evening hours. I'm thinking he's living under the stump and roots of that big spruce tree that fell over last winter. 

I barked at him, and he hopped nonchalantly to our front yard, where he knew I couldn't get him. The front yard is beyond my jurisdiction. 

But he's not the only varmint on my property. Dad found a dead shrew next to a bush while he was mowing the lawn. I didn't get to personally inspect the shrew this time. But I'll remind you doggies and kitties out there to be careful. Shrews have a venomous bite They're quite nasty and sometimes hunt and eat mice and snakes.

Moving on to my daily rounds, I found freshly cut leaves on the ground under my silver maple tree.

That can only mean one thing: the Evil Squirrel Cartel is trying to rebuild their central command station in my tree! I will now direct your attention to the messy pile of leaves in the crook of the tree in the photo below: 

That's a classic example of squirrel architecture! They try this every year so that they can keep a strategic eye on the birdie feeders, the pear tree, and the hawthorn berries by day, and dream about grand larceny at night.

Of course you know, this means war. 

Ghostwriter immediately got out the hose and blasted it. This usually convinces the squirrels to vacate the premises, especially when they get a water cannon shower after dark!

In the meantime, I'll be on heightened alert at my drive-through barking window. That bushy tail varmint has been snarfing seeds from the ground under the feeder all morning! I must have chased him ten times already today!

Grrrrr!

There's been another crummy chipmunk at large too. (Funny how quickly one moved into the vacant real estate after the previous owner got himself stuck behind the garage wallboard and croaked! No honor among thieves I guess.) As you might remember from a previous report, the Conniving Chipmunk Consortium members are notorious for getting doggies in trouble. I chased that new chipmunk up the drain pipe and then kept him there, while I barked and scratched until ghostwriter had to physically drag me away!

Stinky little chipmunk!

I take my patrol duties very seriously. But it's tough being the only doggie in the Double Doggie Homeland Security System (where barking is always free.) These days I really miss my esteemed late associate Joseph (Joey dog) Spaniel. But I have to get some rest sometime. 

Whoa! Did somebody say squirrel?

Zoom!

I even saw a National Guard helicopter making rounds over my yard! Those squirrels are going to be in big trouble now! 

Anyway, I got some good pay for my efforts. 

If you wish to read more about the scurrilous scoundrels in my yard, please check out: 

thedailybonebychester.friday-night-news

thedailybonebychester.i-found-stinky-chipmunk

thedailybonebychester.squirrels-in-love