They're Back Again!

Greetings fellow doggies, kitty friends, and esteemed humans. This is The Daily Bone and I'm your serious doggie reporter
Chester L. W. Spaniel. 

Do you see what I see out there? It's a grackle! I haven't seen one of these since last July. But apparently they're migrating south, and made a pit stop in our yard. 

The Bluehead brothers, Seedy, Stinky, and Pooter, are mooching seeds from the sparrows.

If you've been following The Daily Bone for a while, then you know what grackles do. In Spring, they build nests in the trees and bushes around your home. When the babies hatch, the adults keep the nest clean by picking up the big globs of baby birdie poop and dropping them on your car, and on your dining room window, and on your driveway, and on your lawn chairs, and on the sides of your house, and on your head if you're not careful. They have all the singing prowess of fingernails on a chalkboard, and they bully all the other other birdies. They've been a bone of contention to ghostwriter every Spring for years, with their noise, commotion, and mess.



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On May 25, 2015, I actually caught a grackle, and the others flew around squawking and dive bombing me as I ran around the yard with it. But I digress.

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There was a whole flock of them up in the trees today. But they'd only come down a few at a time. You see, this particular birdie feeder has a mechanism that closes the seed ports when a heavy birdie like a grackle sits on it. They had to wait impatiently for the smaller sparrows, chickadees, and finches to drop seeds down into the grass. Ghostwriter likes to give them elaborate funny names that match their habits. 

Speedy Turdflapper, Corny Poopshooter, and Crappy Dungflinger have arrived! Below, Screechy Takadump is giving the little sparrows the stink eye. 

Oh no, it's Greasy Meadowmuffin,  Precious Wormgrinder, and Crummy Splattermaker waddling around like they own the place.

Look at this! There's a squirrel in the neighbor's yard, and Bubba Slimeysquirt is sitting on the fence asking him to come over and shake the seeds out of the feeder. 

This looks like a job for:

THE DOUBLE DOGGIE HOMELAND SECURITY SYSTEM

We are on the case at a moments notice …

… with state of the art forensics analysis.

We sniff out all the evidence, and leave no stone unturned.

High speed chasing available at no extra cost.

We conduct wide-ranging reconnaissance missions …

… and provide vigorous and thorough patrol duty.

THE DOUBLE DOGGIE HOMELAND SECURITY SYSTEM

We tackle grackles and protect your property from gloppy poobombs!

We send the Evil Squirrel Cartel, the Miscellaneous Mousie Mob,

and the Conniving Chipmunk Consortium packing.

The Secretive Bunny Militia doesn't stand a chance with us around!

And best of all: barking is always free!